My Story 
I grew up scared. My family was riddled with alcoholism and sexual abuse and my relationship with my parents was strained and conflicted. I was told that most people don't ever heal from experiences like mine. Deep down, I didn't believe it. But, what were the other options out there? Unfortunately, I still grew up resenting my parents, hating myself, and mistrusting the world.
I wondered what I could do. I was angry and depressed.
In my early 20s, I separated from my parents and was estranged from them for 8 years. I felt bitter and enraged that my needs for nurturance, support, and trust were not met. I hadn't connected with the underlying feelings of hurt, loneliness, sadness, regret, and deep sorrow yet. I wasn't sure if I wanted to live or die.
And so began my journey of self-exploration and healing.
When my first child was one year old, I called my mother for the first time in 8 years. This was one of the most transformative days of my life. This gesture paved the way to meeting my needs for connection, community, closeness, harmony, and peace. I wanted to heal any disconnection that had been created by my estrangement. I was done venting and releasing the anger that held me back. Now, I felt sad and wanted more hope that our family could be together again.
I didn't know it; but I didn't have much time left.
Before my mother died in 2004, I was able to create the quality of connection and intimacy that we always wanted. A few months before she died, she said I was the only one who was able to fully listen to her. I tried out my new communication skills I was learning at the time called Nonviolent CommunicationSM (NVC) or Compassionate Communication. I felt courageous because I chose to use this new skill although I felt scared and was uncertain about connecting with my mother. Before she died, she expressed her unconditional love and gratitude for this level of connection with me. I was deeply healed.
After my mother died, I made a pact with myself to create and sustain that same level of connection wherever and whenever possible.
Before I die, I want to know that I did all I could to reconcile conflicts and live a life with no regrets.
It takes passion, faith, hope, and sometimes courage to live this way.
I am a pioneer in my family. It looks a little messy at times. The same family that I separated from years ago, plays an integral part in my life and in the lives of my 4 children. I believe every person and every family can create deep and secure relationships rich with love, trust, honesty, and respect.
Now I feel confident, at ease, peaceful, and trusting.
I have an attitude of gratitude!
It wasn't too late for me. It's never too late for you.
Check out the Buzz if you still don't believe me.
“I was frightened by the conflict I grew up with. I tried in vain to avoid it. I learned that by understanding and dancing with it, conflict can be an opportunity to strengthen relationships.” ~ Wendy McDonnell
Why I do what I do?
How do we learn? Why do we make the choices we do? There are many different answers!
Asking these questions inspired me to study Psychology with a focus on Human Learning and Development at the University of Toronto. I graduated in 1995.
I went on to work as an Education Director for the Oxford Learning Centre, where I gained perspective about children's needs around education, time management, study skills, goal setting, and organization. I enjoy sharing these skills with children and adults when suitable! My love of pregnancy, birth, breastfeeding, and family led me to become a La Leche League Canada Leader for 7 1/2 years. I now teach privately, coach parents, and facilitate groups. My own four children have taught me how we learn organically, using both sides of the brain for maximum creativity. I believe my Reiki Master Training, personal development, healing, and easy-going personality helps me to see more beauty in people than they are often able to see in themselves.
The practice of Nonviolent CommunicationSM (NVC) has been central to my work with adults and children since 2003. Along with NVCSM, my training in the process of Collaborative Family Law (CFL) allows me to support people seeking to use the CFL process for divorce and to gain more understanding about the needs of divorcing couples and their children.
My concern about the needs of dying and grieving people from all walks of life led me to train in palliative care at Hospice Wellington, specifically to understand more about Terminal Illness, Grief, and Bereavement and what is important to people at different stages in life.
I bring my unique blend of qualifications, my deep empathy, and a compassionate light-heartedness to my work to create a safe space of unconditional acceptance for my clients. My hands-on expertise in transforming my own childhood trauma and conflicted family relationships into closeness, trust, honesty and compassion allows me to empower others to make profound and healing changes in their own lives.